Surrealtweets (Jan-Feb)

   At another table, a man tries to balance a spoon from his nose. My companion criticizes his technique: “His chin is in the way.” #

“To balance a spoon from your nose, you have to tuck in your chin, and let the spoon dangle free, or your chin knocks it away.”

The gruesome graceful wet Timbuktu grew a beard madly, but the dirty bearded pen washed slowly. 6:30 PM Mar 4th via web Delete

  

The lonely pineapple complains cunningly to the jubilant purple knickers, but the large idiotic goldfish objected objectively. 6:29 PM Mar 4th via web Delete

  

from a game of exquisite corpse . . . . 6:28 PM Mar 4th via web Delete

  

When she set a fur-covered spoon at my place, and carefully brushed the fur of the teacup before serving, I knew this was love. #cnftweet 9:54 PM Mar 3rd via web Delete

  

Silver wears: spoons gather in pools and become spools that loop gracefully and gleamingly across Silver’s soft skin 9:26 PM Mar 3rd via web Delete

  

My neighbors held an exorcism. I don’t believe in spirits, but I once found my spoon bent in half by my plate. I’m glad I moved. #cnftweet 9:16 PM Mar 3rd via web Delete

  

The mystery of notes discovered on old pads: “mirrors, ceremonies, proposals, weddings, divorces, parties, dinners, food.” #cnftweet 7:19 PM Mar 2nd via web Delete

  

seem to have slept through the big hockey game . . . good lord, how did my beard get so long? 6:08 PM Feb 28th via web

  

. . . underwater conflagration altercation . . . 6:06 PM Feb 28th via web 

  

. . . spontaneous seashell combustion . . . . 8:13 PM Feb 27th via web

Scan cancellations / hoping for the correct name / seeking a snow day Feb 26th via web

  

Snow day #haiku cancellations roll / across the television / there we are, at last 2:25 PM Feb 26th via web

  

Thought I heard the sound of spring peepers but was sadly mistaken–it was just a hidden track at the end of a Neko Case CD. #cnftweet 10:54 AM Feb 23rd via web

  

. . . . contemplating penguins . . . . 7:34 PM Feb 21st via web

  

Dance tomato, dance artichoke, your wedding day will be as clear as the gaze of carp. B Peret #quote 7:42 PM Feb 19th

  

My tomatoes are riper than your wooden shoes. B Peret #quote 7:41 PM Feb 19th via web

  

A bird in the hand, two in the bush, let the one go to join the others. #surrealproverbs 7:09 PM Feb 16th via web

  

Fish is a dish best served as revenge. #surrealproverbs 7:07 PM Feb 16th via web

Radio-free Missouri, a friend calls it, and I’m driving north to Iowa, when the cassette tape breaks and jams the player. #cnftweet 9:51 AM Feb 11th via web

  

Topeka to Emporia, 50 some miles of interstate, not a “world’s largest ball of twine,” not even a curve, to break the monotony. #cnftweet 9:49 AM Feb 11th via web

  

As I load my snowblower back up after clearing a sidewalk and ride off into the sunset, I’ll hear a child yell, “Come back, Shane!” 6:31 PM Feb 10th via web Delete

  

Thinking I should load up my snowblower and head south, and help out my snowed-in friends with my snow removal experience and equipment. 6:29 PM Feb 10th via web Delete

  

Strangely snowless in Maine, watching the news reports of heavy snow so very nearby, can’t decide if I’m pleased or disappointed. 6:28 PM Feb 10th via web Delete

  

In prose, a rose. In every rose, eros. 4:12 PM Feb 9th via web Delete

  

In every snore, a rose. In every store, a rose. In every roster, a rose. 4:47 PM Feb 8th via web Delete

  

Birds gotta fly, fish gotta swim, cats gotta nap. 4:33 PM Feb 7th via web Delete

  

As through a sheet of cellophane, crinkly. 8:23 AM Feb 6th via web Delete

  

My grandfather is not dead, as my mother tells me, just despised. I’ve heard whispers from uncles: still alive, still drinking. #cnftweet 9:17 AM Feb 4th via web Delete

  

He’s come by air from NYC. We stand at the coast, watching waves; a smile breaks over his face, “My God, it’s so quiet.” #cnftweet 9:14 AM Feb 4th via web Delete

  

The best thing about leftover pumpkin cheesecake is leftover pumpkin cheesecake. And coffee. #fb 9:07 AM Feb 4th via web Delete

  

pumpkin cheesecake pumpkin cheesecake pumpkin cheesecake coffee 9:26 AM Feb 2nd via web Delete

  

Cold but sunny today, beautiful drive out to coast, good weather for lighthouse viewing. 8:49 PM Jan 31st via web Delete

  

Madam, your astral body is walking among the flowers. Aime Cesaire #quote 11:18 AM Jan 30th via web Delete

  

In 8mm movies, I recognize my father’s walk in the movements of my ten-year-old self, a gait I’ve somehow since lost. #cnftweet 7:18 PM Jan 27th via web Delete

  

Although I don’t believe in hypnotism, I can’t deny that’s me on stage in that video. And, dammit, I do a pretty good chicken. #cnftweet 7:14 PM Jan 27th via web Delete

  

A canoe is orderly. A period is solemn. A cow is accepted. Gertrude Stein #quote 7:13 PM Jan 22nd via web Delete

  

Suspect a single buttered flower, suspect it certainly, suspect it then glide. Gertrude Stein #quote 7:11 PM Jan 22nd via web Delete

  

After a fire, on the front lawn: two dogs, one receiving oxygen, a cat in a carrier, a bird in a cage, looking ruffled. #cnftweet 10:15 AM Jan 21st via web Delete

  

No cognac, no roses, no graveside visit. For the first time in 61 years, no mystery visitor to Poe’s grave to toast his birthday. 6:12 PM Jan 20th via web Delete

  

And his singular whisper; it grew the very echo of my own. EA Poe #quote 7:31 PM Jan 19th via web Delete

  

Happy 201st Birthday, Edgar Allan Poe. 7:29 PM Jan 19th via web Delete

  

This is no authority for the abuse of cheese. G Stein #fb 7:55 PM Jan 18th via web Delete

  

Place to place, finally settling down. #6wordmemoirs 4:47 PM Jan 15th via web Delete 

A cold in a nose, a single cold nose makes an excuse. Two are more necessary. Gertrude Stein #quote 4:56 PM Jan 14th via web Delete

  

Single fish single fish single fish egg-plant single fish sight. Gertrude Stein. #quote 4:55 PM Jan 14th via web Delete

  

“Thunder Snow” Heaven battles hell / Wreck, ruin, boom, flash / Snow falls like angels. #haiku #snow 6:44 PM Jan 10th via web Delete

  

Cats and Snow 2: Two crows in a bare / Tree, grooming each other’s feathers. / Cats watch—so do I. #snow #haiku 10:00 AM Jan 10th via web Delete

  

Cats and Snow 1: Cats watch the snow fall: / A thousand white birds flutter / Past—just out of reach. #snow #haiku 9:59 AM Jan 10th via web Delete

  

Kaleidoscope of / Blue wiper fluid on my / windshield swirled with snow. #snow #haiku 11:58 AM Jan 9th via web Delete

    

“Snow on the Roof”: Every roof collapse / Begins with a single snow / Flake, small, light, floating. #snowku #haiku 9:49 AM Jan 9th via web Delete

  

“6 am Snowplow”: Cold metal scraping / Over asphalt and ice sounds / My morning alarm. #snowku #haiku 9:46 AM Jan 9th via web Delete

  

That fourth shot of tequila, that wispy mustache I tried to grow at 16, sideburns at any stage of life. #cnftweet 9:37 AM Jan 7th via web

  

Regret is always served cold, and like revenge, it will sustain you for a long time, but it can be very hard to swallow. #cnftweet 9:36 AM Jan 7th via web

REGRET seems a particularly inviting #cnftweet topic for the Thursday Theme. So many possibilities to choose from . . . 8:43 PM Jan 6th via web

  

Finally made it to the film “The Road” today. I was the only one in the theater for the matinee, which seemed appropriate, if eerie. 8:40 PM Jan 6th via web

  

Gift for the new year: / our neighbor plows our drive, no / paper, bows, just no snow. #haiku 4:55 PM Jan 5th via web

  

Winter sounds 2: ice cracks, a giggle of snow against the window pane, soft chuckle of wind caressing the eaves. 3:04 PM Jan 4th via web

Winter sounds: listening to the not-so distant rumbling crashing dashing of icicles falling from the eaves to the ground. #cnftweet 3:03 PM Jan 4th via web

  

Confused fans, each holding a letter: I think they meant to spell out “noise” (as in make some), but instead spelled: NOSIE! 6:49 PM Jan 3rd via web

Some people might think I’m crazy, he tells me, driving 8 hours just to drop off presents, turn around, and drive back. #cnftweet 10:54 AM Dec 25th, 2009 via web

  Xmas Hitchhiking: Gifts in the backseat. They told me to stay away, he says, but I’m bringing my children presents anyway. #cnftweet 4:23 PM Dec 24th, 2009 via web

1987: Already packed, my last day in Tucson: a rare Xmas eve snow in the desert city, so beautiful I forget my disappointment. #cnftweet 4:18 PM Dec 24th, 2009 via web

A surreal Xmas to all: penguin eggs burning blue in the fireplace, tiny Elvises caroling by tree, fur-covered glasses full of good cheer. 3:16 PM Dec 24th, 2009 via web

Left Minnesota just ahead of the blizzard, sending warm thoughts of cozy fireplaces to the great plains. 3:09 PM Dec 24th, 2009 via web

Colorblind, but with a keen sense of contrast, he spots pheasants hidden in roadside fields, not fooled by camouflage. #cnftweet

The iced-over lake is bumpy, covered in debris, looking more like a snow-dusted plowed field than a smooth-surfaced frozen lake. #cnftweet

Hope in gates, hope in spoons, hope in doors, hope in tables, no hope in daintiness and determination. Hope in dates. G Stein #quote 8:10 PM Dec 2nd, 2009 via web

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A sound, a whole sound is not separation, a whole sound is in an order. G Stein #quote 8:09 PM Dec 2nd, 2009 via web

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Sometimes hidden in Breton: Apollinaire, Peret, Eluard, Time, Dreams, Flames, Animals, Flames, Spoons, Glass, Night, Waves, and Thanks. 9:54 AM Dec 1st, 2009 via web

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Sometimes hidden in flames: names of blue animals, Breton nights, waves of Peret, Apollinaire festivals, empty glass houses, smoking dreams. 9:51 AM Dec 1st, 2009 via web

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Sometimes hidden in dreams: names of smoking blue flames, festivals of black spoons, little yellow glass animals, cold waves of time. 8:34 PM Nov 30th, 2009 via web

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Sometimes hidden in names: blue flames of animal waves, cold little spoons, yellow fires of time, smoking festivals of glass, dreams. 8:30 PM Nov 30th, 2009 via web

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In the house of time: Cold little yellow fires, black waves of smoking glass, a festival of spoons, flames of blue animal dreams.

In the house of time: Cold little yellow fires, black waves of smoking glass, a festival of spoons, flames of blue animal dreams. 8:38 PM Nov 29th, 2009 via web Delete

  

. . . spoons hidden dark cold little yellow fire names festivals glass black waves 8:36 PM Nov 29th, 2009 via web

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peret breton night apollinaire festival houses time house smoking avoid eluard blue dreams thanks sometimes surrealist animal flames . . . 8:36 PM Nov 29th, 2009 via web

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My most used words via tweetcloud make a nice surrealist tweet in and of themselves: 8:33 PM Nov 29th, 2009 via web

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I just generated my #TweetCloud out of a year of my tweets. Top three words: peret, breton, night – http://w33.us/2q38 8:31 PM Nov 29th, 2009 via Tweet Cloud

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Other colorful days of the week: Purple Thursday, Green Saturday, Beige Wednesday, and Candy-Apple Tuesday.